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Just Drive with Calum, Arbroath (2026)

01/09/2026

😳 HOW IN THE HECK?! 😳

Let’s give it up for the one & only…

💪 CHLOE MERCHANT 💪

🏹 “THE SPANISH ARCHER” 🏹 better known as ELBOW 💪😂 Just watch her change gear… dunno how she does it but somehow the elbows come out, the limbs go everywhere and the gears actually change 😂🫣😀

She’s only gone n SMASHED IT! 💪😃🎉🎊 That’s how it’s done! SKILLZ DAY in Montrose completed with… hang on… ZERO FAULTS!!! 💪💃🏻🎯

What a wild ride we’ve been on. Chloe had done lessons before, heard about some dafty called THEEEE Instructor God 🤷‍♂️😂 and that was it. Match made in heaven! Sometimes it just needs to be the right match and bosh… off we go 🚗💨

We’ve had so many laughs, talked about moving to Dundee for uni… she’s not now 😂 I tried to convince her that free buses were cheaper than trains but nope… gal loves a train 🚆😂 Lessons have been really good and Chloe just understood everything I wanted and needed from her, so it meant we could crack on and get things done.

She’s mad into netball as well and dya know what… it actually sounds pretty good, I may have to go watch a game! That’s about 4/5 lassies now hmwhi okay netball that I’ve had pass and it does sound interesting 🤔😂

MOVING ON TO THE SKILLZ BITTY…

🤔🙄🙈🤣 YA SMASHED IT TODAY! 🎯💯🥇🤙 SKILLZ DAY IS COMPLETED! ✅

Another test I was FORCED to come on 😂 and it was sooooooo boring. Chloe literally bored me to death 💀 Nothing to see here. Now I mark harshly, I look for everything… but ugh… just nothing 😂

Loved when the examiner said ya passed and you literally didn’t listen 🤦‍♂️😂 Honestly, none of us has anything to say except bloody well done! 👍

Chloe, it really has been a pleasure and I’m glad ya asked me to help ya get this done. It’s been a fair wee while but we got it 💪 Now we just all wanna know…

HOW DID THE DRIVE TO NETBALL IN DUNDEE GO TONIGHT IN DAD’S TANK?! 😂🤣

Did she make it? Did the Spanish Archer survive? Did Elbow manage to change gear? Is Dad’s tank still in one piece? And most importantly… WILL SHE ACTUALLY REPLY ON HERE?! 🤣🤣🤣

Huge congratulations Chloe ❤️ Enjoy that licence, you’ve absolutely smashed it! 🚗💨

Instructor 😇 God, over & out.

⚫️⚪️🔴

20/08/2026

😳 WHAT IN THE FUDGE 😳

Let’s give it up for the one & only…

💪 JENNA ANDERSON 💪

“THE CURATOR” (runs the family house, deals with Mr Nightmare - son or hubby you decide, runs their business page and some how brings it all together and it just works😂🫣😀)

She’s only gone n smashed it! 💪😃 🎉🎊

Well this lassie done good…smashing her test first time - nobody knows how but she has and completed Skillz Day in Forfar with just hang on…ZERO faults!!! 💪 💃🏻

What a rollercoaster it’s been, Jen came to me nervous as hell to drive but with the DRIVE (🫣😂) to do it! She tried when younger and it just didn’t feel right. Nerves were shot to pieces then she met this idiot - ME 🤪. She seemed to like my teaching style 😂 what style I said 🤦‍♂️😂. I just teach like a friend or a dad - have fun, teach safe driving and get the job done whilst putting the world to rights 🫡

Lessons have been great, all she needed was a safety to push her and somehow I was her Ying to her Yang. We clocked and she just took it all onboard. Nervous though out, mock test was a bloody shambles but something changed a wee while ago…

I changed her test to earlier, she panicked then went wait…he must believe I can do this 💪. Then she stated going out in the family 🚗 too. We even did a family lesson with Ando & the wee man. Nae hassle to Jen by this point and that’s when I knew she had this! Did I think she’d pass - YES, did I think ZERO FAULTS - ahahaha of course 😜 👀

IM SO PROUD OF JEN 💪

MOVING ON TO THE SKILLZ BITTY…

🤔🙄🙈🤣 YA SMASHED IT
TODAY 🎯💯🥇🤙 & SKILLZ DAY IS COMPLETED. It was nice to hear the examiner say the great words - you’ve passed. And and and ZERO FAULTS! The drive home was funny - Jen has never been so quiet with me 😳 😱 shock setting in

Eve - you know you’re a family friend and I can’t wait to get Mr A round to paint the house. Just think you can get all the lesson money back when he’s done the job 😂. Get in touch with the family business

Bryan Anderson Painter and Decorator, Ames taper

Instructor 😇 God, over & out

⚫️ ⚪️ 🔴

18/08/2026

🚨🚗 ANGUS & DUNDEE… WE NEED MORE TESTS! 🚗🚨

Angus and Dundee Driving Test Swaps

We’ve already had loads of tests go up and a few swaps done 👏

So a massive THANK YOU to everyone getting involved ❤️

BUT… we need to make this thing BIGGER THAN A DRIVING TEST QUEUE AT 8AM 😂

Got a test you don’t want?
👉 GET IT UP! 👀

Want a different date/time?
👉 KEEP YOUR EYES GLUED TO THE PAGE! 👁️😂

The more tests that get posted, the more chance we’ve all got of swapping and getting something that actually suits.

COME ON ANGUS & DUNDEE… FEED THE SWAP MACHINE! 🔄🤣

Let’s make this page the busiest little test-swapping corner of Facebook! 🚗💨

⚫️ ⚪️ 🔴

14/08/2026

🚨🚗 RIGHT… I’VE ONLY GONE AND DONE A THING! 🚗🚨

Angus and Dundee Driving Test Swaps

Fed up watching everyone lose the plot trying to find driving tests? 😂
Me too… so I’ve created a NEW ANGUS & DUNDEE TEST SWAP PAGE! 🙌

The idea is simple — if you’ve got a test you no longer want, need to swap, fancy a better date/time, or you’re desperately hunting for one… this is the place to be! 👀

And before anyone asks… NO, I haven’t magically created 400 extra driving tests. 😂
If only it was that easy!

👉 JOIN IT
👉 SHARE IT
👉 TAG YOUR MATES
👉 GET EVERYONE ON THERE!

The more people who join, the more chance we’ve got of helping each other out.

So if you’re one of my Just Drive with Calum lot, do me a favour and give the page a bloody good share! ❤️

Let’s get it absolutely RAMMED and hopefully make the great Scottish driving test hunt slightly less traumatic. 😂💪

ANGUS & DUNDEE — LET’S SWAP SOME TESTS! 🚗💨

⚫️ ⚪️ 🔴

10/08/2026

🚨 WELL… THIS IS AWKWARD! 😂 🚨

Latest driving test figures are out and Scotland is absolutely SMASHING IT… just not in the way we’d hoped! 🤣

🥇 Forfar – 29.7 weeks
🥈 Callander – 27.7 weeks
🥉 Arbroath – 27 weeks

Of course, TWO of my main test centres are in the top three. 🤣. And I bet my third option, Montrose, is bloomin close to the 27 weeks too! 🤦‍♂️😂

Nearly SEVEN MONTHS waiting for a test… then we go through periods of tests being cancelled at the last minute too. 🙃

BUT… don’t worry! We’ll get the tests we need, we’ll work hard, we’ll be ready… and WE’LL NAIL IT! 💪🚗💨

Don’t get me wrong, in all 3 Angus towns we have great examiners so this isn’t a dig at them. Just wish we had more tests & more examiners like before covid and stopping instructors from booking/swapping tests is mad. Just have to roll with the punches gang, on the positive side…y’all get to see me longer 🫣🤣😱😳🤪

⚫️ ⚪️ 🔴

Teaching you to drive… apparently patience is part of the package! 😂

31/07/2026

😳 SMASH & GRAB TODAY! 😳

Right troops… let’s hear it for the one & only…

💪 EVE SIMPSON 💪

AKA…

🤫 “THE ORIGINAL GOSSIP GIRL.”

Honestly… if there was a degree in knowing everybody else’s business, she’d have graduated with honours. 😂🫣 Every lesson came with the full weekly update and I absolutely lived for it.

Anyway…

She’s only gone and absolutely BATTERED IT!! 💪🎉🎊

First-time pass… (that’s how it’s done, Mya 🙈😂) AND completed Skillz Day in Arbroath with…

🥁🥁🥁

ZERO FAULTS!! 💯🎯🔥

Not one.

Not two.

Absolutely hee haw.

Perfect drive. 💪

Now then…

What a few months this has been. 🤪
What a delight.
What a gossip.
What a pain in my backside.
What an absolute legend. ❤️😂

Honestly… another brilliant friend made.

We’ve laughed.
We’ve cried.
Well ok… I cried. 🙈😂

I started greetin first, so I’ll reluctantly take the blame for that one. 😭🤣 We’ve had Mayf shop dramas 👀🚔🍿Friendship dramas…Family dramas…Life dramas…Probably a weather drama somewhere in there too. 🌧️😂

Netflix would’ve signed you up after Lesson 3.
Oh… and somewhere between solving the world’s problems…We actually managed to do quite a bit of driving. 🚗😂

Now…

One thing I always tell every pupil is…

“Ask me anything. There are no stupid questions.”

Well…

I stand corrected.

😂😂😂😂😂

I’m joking…

Sort of.

I reckon she asked somewhere between 4 million and 6 million questions. Google started asking her for answers. 🤣 But that’s exactly why she became such a good driver.

She wanted to understand everything.

🚗 RIGHT… THE SKILLZ BITTY…

🤔🙄🤣

YA ABSOLUTELY SENT IT!! 💯🔥

Skillz Day complete. ZERO FAULTS.

And hearing the examiner say ”I’m delighted to tell you you’ve passed.”

Never gets old. ❤️

Eve wanted me sitting in the back as her emotional support human (basically a comfort blanket with a pulse 😂), and I actually loved every second.

Although…

Her and the examiner never stopped gassing . 🤣. I learned all about engine combustion…Why German cars are apparently superior…
And remembered how good Elbow actually are.

Cheers for the playlist update. 🎶😂

Eve…I actually hate you. 🙈😂 That drive home you had me greeting. Then…The way you absolutely stitched your mum up…Should be illegal. 🤣

Watching her face slowly sink while she thought you’d failed…

Only for you to pull the pass certificate out…

Outstanding.

10/10.

😂👏

I’m unbelievably proud of you. Go enjoy T’Polo. 🚗💨

Massive thank you to Mumma & Papa S ❤️ for all the extra practice and for trusting me with both your girls over the years. Both girls have been an absolute credit to you and, genuinely, I feel like I’ve become part of the family.

Instructor 😇 God… over & out.

⚫️⚪️🔴

28/07/2026

🫡 YES YES YES!!! 🫡

Everybody make some noise for the one & only…

💪 CHRIS “BUGSY” MALONE 💪 (IYKYK 🤔)

AKA…

🍗 “THE COLONEL” 🍗

He basically lives at KFC 😂 honestly I’m convinced they’ve given him his own bedroom there for all the night shifts he does at this point. 🤷‍♂️🍗

The big man has only gone and absolutely SMASHED IT!! 💪🎉🎊

😎 OI OI!!!

ChrissyBoy has bagged himself a PASS, smashing his Skillz Day in Montrose with only 2 driving faults! 👏👏

Now…let’s rewind to Lesson One…😂

👨‍🏫 Me: “Chris…press the gas.”

😳 Chris: “No Calum…I can’t…I’m scared.”

👨‍🏫 “Speed up!”

😬 “I CAN’T CALUM!!”

Honestly, if fear burned calories he’d have been a skeleton by lesson two. 🤦‍♂️😂

But listen…can’t isn’t in my dictionary.

You CAN.

You WILL.

And eventually…you DID. 💪😎

The transformation has been class.

Nervous.

Worried.

Quieter than a church on a Monday morning.

Now?? 😂😂

Mate…I know your life story, your work story, your dinner plans and probably your WiFi password. 🤔🤣

Watching your confidence grow has been brilliant. Once you relaxed, it all just clicked. From one dad to another, it’s been class getting to know you, the laughs, the chats, and the “world problems solved” between roundabouts. 😂

🎯 THE SKILLZ DAY…

YA ABSOLUTELY SMASHED IT!! 🥇💯🤙

The examiner said the magic words…

“You’ve passed!” 🎉

…and then quickly added…

“…but you were lucky.” 🤣🤣🤣

Now Chris doesn’t usually stall…So of course today he thought…

“I’ll just stop in 3rd gear…that’ll be fine.” 🤔🙈😂

Spoiler…

It was NOT fine. 🤦‍♂️🤣

Still…a pass is a pass and the certificate doesn’t say “Lucky wee bugger.” 😂🏆

Chris, honestly mate, it’s been a pleasure. Buzzing you’ve got it done. Go enjoy the freedom, save yourself a fortune, and remember…

I’m always here if you need anything…Just don’t ask to borrow money. 😂😂💸. Drive safe, enjoy it all, and remember…

The Colonel always delivers. 🍗😎

Instructor 😇 God, over & out.

⚫️ ⚪️ 🔴

29/06/2026

Morning everyone! 👋

Well… turns out getting out of a chair with a baby in your 40a is now a full-contact sport. 🤦‍♂️ Twisted my knee yesterday, been trying to walk it off and woke up feeling about 97 years old. Can hardly bend the bloody thing! 🦵😂

Currently icing it with a bag of frozen Japanese fish desserts and drowning it in Voltarol… peak athleticism. 🫣😂🐟❄️

I’ll phone the docs at 8am, but I think today’s lessons are looking like a no-go. Sorry troops! I’ll stick this on my page too, as I know some of you only read things when it’s too late. 😂

And yes it is a tree trunk and yes it’s clean, it’s called a tan before anyone says 🤣🤣🤣

18/05/2026

👏🇵🇱 DOSKONAŁE PODANIE 🇵🇱👏

Let’s hear it for the one & only…

💪 KATARZYNA ZYSKOWSKA (Kasia) 💪
(Thank god for copy & paste because that name’s above my pay grade 😂)

AKA…

🔥 “THE POLISH BROWNIE” 🔥
Queen of the fake tan… although some weeks she rocks up looking like a tiger loaf 🍞😂

WELL… SHE’S ONLY GONE & SMASHED IT 💥💪🎉

Oi oi 😎👊
Kasia has absolutely NAILED her Skillz Day in Montrose with…

🎯 ZERO FAULTS 🎯

Starting from scratch, tonnes of self doubt, approximately 7 million questions a lesson 🤦‍♂️😂… but honestly, an absolute natural behind the wheel. The self doubt nearly killed me at times 🤯 but Instructor 😇 God simply took some confidence, wrapped it in a bow 🎁 and said:

“Here ya go lass… YOU CAN DO THIS 💪”

And she absolutely could.

Now… we’ve gone through:
🚗 My old car
🚗 My new car
🚗 Another newer car
🚗 HER car

…and every week about her carit was:

“Ugh the clutch is too high…”
“Ugh the gears feel funny…”

S**U KASIA 😂🤯

Every car has quirks — once you learn them, you adapt. And she proved that brilliantly driving FOUR different cars with no dramas 👏

Honestly there’s not even any outrageous near-death stories to tell 😂 just great chats, giggles, and some questions ranging from:
🙈 silly
🤔 outrageous
🙏 THANK GOD YOU ASKED THAT

NOW FOR THE BEST BIT…

As always, I ask:
“So… how did it go then?”

Kasia:
“Nah I failed at a junction…”

Meanwhile the examiner is stood there practically winking at me like 😉 “she’s passed mate.”

Then she starts listing MORE reasons she’s failed 🤦‍♂️😂

Finally the examiner cuts in with:
“Okay… you’ve PASSED.”

Kasia:
“Oh… but I got a few faults?”

Examiner:
“Nope. Fabulous drive.”

💥 ZERO FAULTS 💥

Trust the process. Trust me. Most importantly — trust yourself 💪

Kasia — you’ve been an absolute gem to teach. Lessons have been “perf” 😂 and I’m buzzing you trusted what I was telling you the whole way through.

I’ll set people up to pass all day long… but YOU blew my mind today 👏

Huge thanks to your mum & dad too for getting the extra practice in — it always helps build confidence, and they should be massively proud. You’re a credit to them ❤️. Always polite. Always on time. Never a bother. Now go enjoy the freedom 🚗💨

Instructor 😇 God
Over & Out

Just Drive with Calum

01/09/2026

20/08/2026

18/08/2026

14/08/2026

10/08/2026

31/07/2026

28/07/2026

29/06/2026

18/05/2026

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