24/11/2025
It is very important to take care of your outboard, at least on a yearly basis!
Listen here my boy…
We need to chat.
Because some of you are out here treating your boats like they’re unbreakable Marvel superheroes, meanwhile they’re holding on with cable ties, duct tape, and 200 hours of overdue tears.
You’ll service your R1,000,000 car the MOMENT it makes a sound you don’t recognise.
“Ag no, babe, the Audi made a tick noise, I’m booking it in immediately.”
But your outboard?
Nah.
Your outboard must just “make a plan.”
Your outboard must just vibe through life like a student with no budget.
Bud… 𝘄𝗵𝘆 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗵𝗲𝗹𝗹 𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘀𝗸𝗶𝗽𝗽𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘀𝗲𝗿𝘃𝗶𝗰𝗲𝘀 𝗼𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗺𝗼𝘀𝘁 𝗮𝗯𝘂𝘀𝗲𝗱 𝗲𝗻𝗴𝗶𝗻𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗼𝘄𝗻?
The thing LIVES in water.
It drinks fuel that half the time has been sitting in Jerry cans since 2021.
It works at 5,000 RPM all day like it’s trying to flap the boat into low earth orbit.
Meanwhile you’re like:
“Eish, I’ll service it next month.”
NEXT MONTH?!
This thing is screaming for help TODAY.
I promise you now, every dam in SA has that same oke.
We all know him.
The guy who bought a boat 4 years ago, used it twice, then parked it under a tree like it’s a bonsai project.
Then one long weekend he decides:
“Yoh, let’s hit the water gents!”
He rocks up with confidence.
Cooler box packed.
Chommies looking excited.
Wife already annoyed.
Kids screaming.
Vibes... 𝒊𝒎𝒎𝒂𝒄𝒖𝒍𝒂𝒕𝒆.
He reverses the boat in.
Turns the key…
𝗔𝗡𝗗 𝗧𝗛𝗘 𝗢𝗨𝗧𝗕𝗢𝗔𝗥𝗗 𝗠𝗔𝗞𝗘𝗦 𝗔 𝗡𝗢𝗜𝗦𝗘 𝗟𝗜𝗞𝗘 𝗜𝗧’𝗦 𝗧𝗥𝗬𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗧𝗢 𝗟𝗘𝗔𝗩𝗘 𝗧𝗛𝗜𝗦 𝗗𝗜𝗠𝗘𝗡𝗦𝗜𝗢𝗡.
Coughing.
Spluttering.
Choking like it’s inhaling pepper spray.
You start panicking.
Your chommies are pretending not to judge you.
People on the shore are watching you like you’re filming a documentary called:
“𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗡𝗼𝘁 𝗧𝗼 𝗕𝗼𝗮𝘁: 𝗔 𝗦𝗼𝘂𝘁𝗵 𝗔𝗳𝗿𝗶𝗰𝗮𝗻 𝗧𝗿𝗮𝗴𝗲𝗱𝘆.”
Then you go:
“Hah, must be old fuel hey.”
NO BUD.
It’s not the fuel.
It’s YOU.
YOU didn’t service it.
𝗢𝗶𝗹?
Older than your matric certificate.
𝗜𝗺𝗽𝗲𝗹𝗹𝗲𝗿?
Looks like a chew toy from the SPCA.
𝗙𝘂𝗲𝗹 𝗳𝗶𝗹𝘁𝗲𝗿?
Full of hopes, dreams and sand from Bronkies.
𝗚𝗲𝗮𝗿 𝗼𝗶𝗹?
Looking like cappuccino foam from Mugg & Bean.
But you wanna complain the boat won’t start.
My guy… at this point the motor is doing its BEST.
It’s performing MIRACLES.
It deserves a medal.
It deserves counselling.
The rule is simple:
𝟭𝟬𝟬 𝗵𝗼𝘂𝗿𝘀 𝗢𝗥 𝗼𝗻𝗰𝗲 𝗮 𝘆𝗲𝗮𝗿.
Whichever comes first.
If you’re a weekend dam-goer... YOU ARE NOT DOING 100 HOURS.
You’re doing 20, maybe 30 if you’re enthusiastic.
So guess what?
YOU SERVICE ONCE A YEAR.
EVERY. SINGLE. YEAR.
It’s the cheapest thing you’ll ever do in boating.
Skip it?
And you’re one start-up away from turning your outboard into a R150,000 paperweight.
Boating is not complicated:
Service it.
Flush it.
Use fresh fuel.
Stop treating it like a disposable Bic lighter.
Because the day it leaves you stranded on the dam while your family stares at you like you’ve just ruined Christmas?
That’s on YOU bru.
Not the boat.