Post Round Dump

Post Round Dump 🏁 Australia’s leading low budget provider of motorsport journalism.
📺 Race wrap-ups & docos
🇦🇺 VIC-based
🎙Motorsport Moshpit

Had a read of the Tyre gate legal outcome and think its a dry read? Give this a hoon!
09/04/2026

Had a read of the Tyre gate legal outcome and think its a dry read? Give this a hoon!

FROM THE PRD DEPARTMENT OF RED:A respected Compton “community figure” known as Big Flint meant for his European vacation...
09/03/2026

FROM THE PRD DEPARTMENT OF RED:

A respected Compton “community figure” known as Big Flint meant for his European vacation to be a quiet retreat. Instead, stepping off the train at the Italian Grand Prix, he was left speechless by what he assumed was the most militant, lucrative chapter of his own gang on the planet.

Greeting him was a sea of crimson. Over 100,000 soldiers in matching red marched toward the asphalt battleground while police stood by, letting the massive syndicate choke the streets with flares and territorial chants.

"Back home, two dozen guys on a corner brings out the police choppers," Flint explained, clutching a scarlet flag he bought for safe passage. "Here? They’re 100,000 deep with international corporate sponsorships, selling embroidered jackets for €300 a pop. The hustle is strictly generational."

Attempting to deduce the leadership structure, Flint approached a weeping local waving a yellow shield flag. "I asked the old timer who the main shot caller was, and he just pointed at the screen screaming about some dude named Charles. I don't know what block this Charles runs, but grown men are literally sobbing over his tyre degradation."

As the crimson tide flooded the track, Flint threw up his set out of sheer admiration. Embraced by an Italian patriarch screaming "Forza Ferrari!", Big Flint is now drafting a proposal to his LA compatriots: replacing turf wars with race car and aggressive merchandising might just be the key to long term syndicate longevity.

FROM THE PRD DEPARTMENT OF ALCOHOLIC TIME MANAGEMENT:The chronological sanctity of the annual Bathurst Sunday drinking s...
09/02/2026

FROM THE PRD DEPARTMENT OF ALCOHOLIC TIME MANAGEMENT:
The chronological sanctity of the annual Bathurst Sunday drinking schedule has been plunged into a chaotic grey area, leaving traditionalists deeply unsettled by Supercars’ decision to bump the Great Race start time to 11:30 AM.

For decades, the unwritten constitution of Australian motorsport consumption has dictated a rigid timeline. The morning consists of Coffees, Beers, and perhaps a rogue bourbon and cola before a seamless, socially acceptable transition into the “mid morning tinny” during the formation lap.

However, this 15 minute schedule adjustment has completely obliterated those cultural parameters without any public consultation.
"It is an absolute chronological no man's land, mate," explains 32 year old sparky and amateur booze logistics coordinator, Wayne Kurr.

Standing in his driveway with a look of existential dread usually reserved for unexpected tax bills, Wayne breaks down the crisis. "Usually, 11:45 AM is exactly when you pivot. The bacon and egg rolls have settled. You crack that first crisp lager of the day and nobody bats an eye. But 11:30? If I open a beer at 11:15 to get ready for lights out, the missus asks if we need to call a helpline. Am I having a late brunch beer or a tragically early lunch tinny? Do I transition to heavy stouts to mask the time? The boundaries are gone."

The crisis has forced local viewing syndicates to drastically re evaluate their Sunday operations. Some purists are attempting to bridge the gap with an awkward "pre race mimosa" phase, while others are simply giving up and transitioning straight to pre mixed dark spirits before the sun clears.

At press time, Wayne had resolved the issue by simply pouring his first beer into a novelty oversized coffee mug to avoid neighborhood judgement.

FROM THE PRD DEPARTMENT OF CRT TELEVISION:Local Truck Driver Trent Higgins is struggling to get around the hype of Garry...
09/01/2026

FROM THE PRD DEPARTMENT OF CRT TELEVISION:

Local Truck Driver Trent Higgins is struggling to get around the hype of Garry Rogers Motorsport’s 2026 Bathurst wildcard. While the rest of the country is weeping tears of pure early 2000s joy at the return of the iconic Valvoline livery, Trent feels short changed.

Looking at crisp, 4K images of the Chevrolet Camaro livery, Trent admits the whole thing just feels deeply inauthentic to his lived experience.

"It's just too crisp, mate," sighs Trent, adjusting a frayed early 2000s Bathurst 1000 cap that has permanently fused to his scalp. "I spent four years of my adolescence driving a similar Valvoline Commodore around Mount Panorama on the PS2. If the car doesn’t look like it’s made out of twelve jagged triangles, it’s not the real deal."

For Trent, the sheer existence of modern curved body panels is a slap in the face to the golden era of low poly Aussie motorsport. His emotional connection to the livery was forged in the crucible of his parents' rumpus room, gripping a sticky Mad Catz controller while drinking warm Pepsi max.

He still holds the unbroken neighbourhood record for completing a lap of the Mountain in under 1:45. A feat achieved exclusively by ignoring the brake pedal and using the invisible wall at Griffin’s Bend to ricochet his pixelated Commodore toward The Cutting.

Trent has formally petitioned Supercars Australia to artificially downgrade the wildcard's real life graphics and limiting the car to 15 frames per second on the broadcast.

And yes, that is the 2001 car on the image. Calm down champ.

Garry Rogers Motorsport
Nathan Herne
James Moffat

A CHAMPAGNE AND SLICKS/POST ROUND DUMP JOINT INVESTIGATION:Local motorsport enthusiast and retired regional manager, 61...
08/31/2026

A CHAMPAGNE AND SLICKS/POST ROUND DUMP JOINT INVESTIGATION:
Local motorsport enthusiast and retired regional manager, 61 year old Gary Parkinson, has once again ruined a perfectly good Sunday family lunch by complaining that modern motorsport lacks the looming specter of imminent death.

Sitting deep in his orthopedic recliner, Gary stared in utter disgust as a modern Formula One driver walked away completely unscathed from a 250km/h shunt.

"Look at this bloke, casually unbuckling himself and complaining about a stiff neck on the team radio," Gary scoffed, taking a cautious sip of his mid strength lager to avoid irritating his acid reflux.

“Back in the day, you hit the barrier at Monza and it was an immediate tragedy. The cars were made of aluminum foil and pure aviation fuel. You didn't walk away, you were memorialized in black and white photos wearing massive sideburns while an Italian model wept over your closed casket. That’s what separated the men from the boys."

Gary, whose most recent brush with the grim reaper involved a mild case of food poisoning from a servo sausage roll, firmly believes the introduction of Halo and fire retardant suits has turned the sport into an absolute joke.

"It’s just glorified go karting now," he continued, completely ignoring the fact that his own daily driver is equipped with nine airbags, lane keep assist, and autonomous emergency braking.
"Where’s the romance? Where’s the chain smoking in the pitlane knowing you had a 30 percent chance of vaporising before the checkered flag? Now they just survive, start a Twitch channel, and play padel in Monaco. It’s sickening."

FROM THE PRD DEEPATMENT OF GRAMMAHTICKAL CORECTNUSS:The Federal Department of Education has today unveiled a landmark so...
08/31/2026

FROM THE PRD DEEPATMENT OF GRAMMAHTICKAL CORECTNUSS:

The Federal Department of Education has today unveiled a landmark social initiative aimed squarely at some of the nation’s most passionate, yet grammatically vulnerable yeast based demographic: V8 Supercars fans.

Dubbed Operation Proper Sledge, the grassroots campaign is designed to help local revheads deliver devastating Facebook insults without undermining their own arguments through catastrophic spelling errors.

The initiative comes after a staggering government report revealed that 87% of online motorsport arguments are immediately lost when a motorsport tragic uses the wrong version of ‘their’ while trying to insult a driver’s intelligence.

"There is nothing more heartbreaking than seeing a bloke deliver a perfectly timed spray on a motorsport page, only to spell 'lose' with two O's," stated the Minister for Education this morning.

To combat this crisis, the government has rolled out the “Bogan-to-English Sledge Dictionary”, a pocket sized guide planned to be distributed at Repco stores and trackside merchandise tents nationwide.
Post Round Dump was able to obtain a snippet of this book from a anonymous source:

You’re vs. Your: Crucial for personal attacks.
Use you're when stating a fact about the person: "You're an absolute drongo for supporting that team." Use your when attacking their property: "Take your broken Mustang straight to the scrap heap."

Their, There, and They’re: The holy trinity of Facebook warfare. "They're going to crash their Camaro right over there into the tyre wall."

Lose vs. Loose: A common pitfall for the crayon eating fan. Your favourite driver didn't loose the championship; they lost it because they are slow. However, the rear end of their car was incredibly loose coming out of Forrest's Elbow.

OBITUARY: Turn 8 of the Adelaide Street Circuit (1999–2026) will pass away peacefully at the end of this year, surrounde...
08/30/2026

OBITUARY:

Turn 8 of the Adelaide Street Circuit (1999–2026) will pass away peacefully at the end of this year, surrounded by $96 million of government MotoGP funding and a fleet of bulldozers.

Born from a sadistic desire to make motorsport professionals question their life choices at 250km/h, Turn 8 lived a long, aggressively hungry life. Over its near three decade reign of terror, the infamous blind, zero margin sweeper consumed an estimated 42,000 tonnes of carbon fibre, shattered fiberglass, and generated significant amounts of income for local automotive parts suppliers.

Known affectionately by local tow truck drivers as "The ATM" and by Supercars team accountants as "The parts cost vacuum," Turn 8 leaves behind a legacy of uncompromising brutality. It did not care if you were a seven time champion or a plucky rookie wildcard; if you missed the apex by a single millimeter, Turn 8 would enthusiastically introduce your chassis to immovable concrete with the force of a localized earthquake.

Friends and family remember Turn 8 for its unique low carb diet, surviving almost entirely on ripped off side mirrors, bent steering arms, and the tears of pit lane mechanics forced to rebuild a completely written off Supercar at 3:00 AM on a Sunday.

South Australians understood the corner for what it truly was: a vital piece of the state's economy, single handedly propping up the local scrap metal market and giving Supercars a guaranteed spot on the Channel 7 nightly news.

Its removal to make way for a safer, FIM approved flowing layout marks the end of an era for the great Turn 8.
In lieu of flowers, relatives suggest crashing a Supercar into Turn 8 virtually in its honor.

-Toasty Trev (im not crying, my eyes are just sweaty)

These GTA6 leaks are getting out of hand.....
08/29/2026

These GTA6 leaks are getting out of hand.....

We blew our entire marketing budget on this graphic design masterpiece. Help us get to 1k anyway.
08/28/2026

We blew our entire marketing budget on this graphic design masterpiece.

Help us get to 1k anyway.

PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT:As the Supercars calendar flips to the endurance season, the nation's most highly qualified ...
08/27/2026

PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT:
As the Supercars calendar flips to the endurance season, the nation's most highly qualified armchair engineers are logging on, cracking their knuckles, and preparing for another exhausting social media parity sh*tstorm.

While the drivers prepare for the physical toll of The Bend and Bathurst, moderators on various Facebook fan pages are currently anticipating a 400% increase in aggressively misspelled posts regarding aerodynamic drag coefficients and engine mapping.

Watch out for these trends this enduro season:

* The Unqualified Experts: Men whose primary mechanical experience involves struggling to change a lawnmower spark plug will begin posting 12 paragraph essays on the aerodynamic impact of a 1 millimetre rear wing adjustment.

* The Conspiracy Theorists: Expect to see complex diagrams involving MS Paint arrows proving that Supercars is deliberately sabotaging the Camaro because something something T888.

* The Barometric Pressure Panic: Following last year's fiasco, "barometric pressure" will become the buzzword of the month. Fans who don't know what a barometer is will demand immediate testing of the Mount Panorama air quality to ensure the Fords aren't breathing "denser, faster oxygen."

* The "Bring Back The V8s" Brigade: Regardless of the actual parity data, a vocal minority will hijack every single post to demand the immediate return of the FG Falcon and VE Commodore, completely ignoring the fact that the year is 2026.

* The Threat of Boycott: At least 4,000 blokes named "Craig" or "Gary" will publicly declare they are boycotting the Bathurst 1000 and cancelling their Kayo subscriptions. Analytics will show that 98% of these men will watch every single practice session live.

Supercars officials have advised teams to avoid looking at the comments section on any post relating to the six race rolling average parity trigger, noting that the sheer volume of unsolicited technical advice from blokes wearing wrap around sunnies in their profile pictures is enough to crash their servers.



Address

North Pole
Boston, MA
02215

Website

Alerts

Be the first to know and let us send you an email when Post Round Dump posts news and promotions. Your email address will not be used for any other purpose, and you can unsubscribe at any time.

Shortcuts

Share