Captain Tootys Biker Smiles page

Captain Tootys Biker Smiles page Captain Tootys Chat page, every one with a love of 2, 3, or 4 wheels welcome am one of the most "down to earth" admins you will ever meet. I stick to my values.

There is nothing about me (or what I own) that is any better than anyone else. That said, I do strive for excellence in everything I do, as I think everyone should. As admin, I have studied every brand of motorcycles there is, to "qualify" myself to run a biker page. Also owned well over a 100 bikes, and to date 79 trikes, most makes, I've been riding nearly 50 years. I love ALL brands, and think

each one has a specific function for the rider in question. I say this as humble as possible - don't compare brands on this page. You won't like the outcome. Harley and Yamaha are my personal favorites, but I don't promote ANY brand, because I think it's irrelevant. I like Harley because it SCREAMS "Bad Boy", and always will. I like Kawasaki because the brand has never changed hands, and the owner is a stickler for quality - (can you say "Samaria sword?"). But I buy used - I look for bikes & trikes in need of a little TLC. Once a bike/trike has been sold, every bit of money spent on it goes back into the community. Being a disabled Biker/Triker myself I understand what its like to want to keep the lifestyle, the way of life our hearts want, but sometimes can't quite find. after being given early medical retirement from government service, I now dedicate my time to helping others stay sane, in this crazy world. If you need help, advice, a friend, just ask. Trikes for sale, just ask, I always know someone selling, and feel free to advertise on this page.

12/09/2026

The Silly Saturday Smile:
Paddy is in court, the judge says"Have you been up before me before?"paddy says I don't know, what time did you get up?

11/09/2026

THIRSTY THURSDAY 🍻
The deals are too good to miss! 👇
🍺 £2 pints – Foster's, John Smith's, Carling, Strongbow, Murphy's & Inch's
🍺 £3.50 pints – Red Stripe & Cruzcampo
🍷 Healy & Grey – £2.50 a glass | £10 a bottle
🥃 Double spirits & mixer – £3.50
💚 Sourz shots – £1
See you at the bar! 🍻

11/09/2026

The Freaky Friday Smile
: The man who last month fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered.

10/09/2026
10/09/2026

This coming weekend folks!

10/09/2026

The Thirsty Thursday Smile:
Maria, a devout Catholic, got married and had 15 children. After her first husband died, she remarried and had 15 more children. A few weeks after her second husband died, Maria also passed away. At Maria's funeral, the priest looked skyward and said, "At last, they're finally together." Her sister sitting in the front row said, "Excuse me, Father, but do you mean she and her first husband, or she and her second husband?" The priest replied, "I mean her legs."

09/09/2026

The Wacky Wednesday smile :
Little Johnny sees his Daddy's car passing the playground and going into the woods.

Curious, he follows the car and sees Daddy and Aunt Jane kissing.

Johnny finds this so exciting and can barely contain himself as he runs home and starts to tell his mother excitedly.

"MOMMY, MOMMY, I WAS AT THE PLAYGROUND AND DADDY AND...."

Mommy tells him to slow down, but that she wants to hear the story.

So Johnny tells her. "I was at the playground and I saw Daddy's car go into the woods with Aunt Jane. I went to look and Daddy was giving Aunt Jane a big kiss, then he helped her take off her shirt, then Aunt Jane helped Daddy take his pants off, then Aunt Jane laid down on the seat, then Daddy...."

At this point, Mommy cut him off and said, "Johnny, this is such an interesting story, suppose you save the rest of it for supper time. I want to see the look on Daddy's face when you tell it tonight."

At the dinner table, Mommy asks Johnny to tell his story.

He describes the car into the woods, the un******ng, laying down on the seat, and, "Then Daddy and Aunt Jane did that same thing Mommy and Uncle Jeff used to do when Daddy was in the Army."

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Hucknall
Nottinghamshire

Opening Hours

Monday 10am - 5pm
Tuesday 9:30am - 4:30pm
Wednesday 9am - 4:22pm
Thursday 9am - 5pm
Friday 9am - 4pm

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